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Thursday, 6 October 2011

Rollin' for Nothin'




Well I've got myself into another fine mess since I fell for a girl who couldn't love me less and this one didn't even have to get to know me. Well, I ain't upset 'cos nothing's really happened yet and it don't affect me directly 'cos I'm kinda used to it. And I'm alright being lonely.

See, I'm a whorehouse built out of lovers' lies and guilt and you're a disco with everybody dancing. I don't mean to be a slut it's just a pick-me-up when I've sunk too low and I've drunk too much. Does it still count as the last laugh if there's no one else laughing?

You ain't the first that I've led astray when what could have been love quickly turns to hate, like the flowers they're gonna harvest for my grave. Well, I hope someone comes along and picks them up and passes them on to someone they love 'cos a flower that pretty shouldn't die beside my grave.

Lately my behaviour's been somewhat unchristian. I've been screaming out for God but he can't hear me or ain't listening, still I'll send a prayer up there somewhere for you. And with that said, I'll let you find a better man, sit here, get depressed and really drunk again 'cos that's just what I do.

You made me see it wasn't about her, it was something in me that I'd often heard people say but until now it hadn't sunk in. Well, maybe I wasn't really listening to them but I think, 'cos I'm romantic, that it sunk in when you said it 'cos there's something when you speak.

I've been a gambler my whole life. I've been taking my chances when they're wrong and when they're right. Tonight I've still got the dice but you're holding my money, so I'm rolling for myself else I'm rolling for nothing.

Well, no I ain't OK, man, I'm going insane since little Miss Kane put the thought inside my brain and now there's a moral decision I have to make. And morally, I've never really stood upright - I've been a whore-faced, lying cunt for all of my life and if you've learned nothing this evening won't you just take this away...

That I meant everything I said and did that night. I just wish you'd known me better.

Now you do.

2 comments:

  1. This is raw and real and exquisitely written. Wow.

    ReplyDelete